Point of View Exercise (Tense Situation)

1) First person

"Honey, what's wrong?" Ian asks me as he reaches his hand across the table at our booth in the diner. 

I pull my hand away and cross my arms, not wanting to hold his hand because it will just make everything harder. I’ve rehearsed this moment so many times in my head over the past two days, but it’s much easier to imagine our breakup than actually verbalizing it to Ian. But why should I care what he thinks? He doesn’t really have feelings for me, he’s only pretending to. And that’s why we have to break up; I love him and he’s only leading me on. “Well…” I start, “it’s nothing.” I trail off, losing my nerve.

“Honey, it’s clearly something. Come on, you know that you can talk to me.” Ian replies.

I try to look into his eyes as I’m about to tell him that we can’t see each other anymore. His dark blue eyes gaze back at me and I lose my courage yet again.

“Well, why don’t I start?” Ian suggests. “I invited you here because I wanted to tell you something important, and I chose this place because knew it is your favorite place, so… well here it goes.”

I fidget underneath the table, unable to anticipate what he is about to say.

“These last few months have been amazing, and I never thought I would have such strong feelings for you. I guess what I have to say is that I love you, Julie.”

I stare back at Ian, unable to figure out what to say. He completely took me by surprise.

“I guess that wasn’t going where I thought it was… I don’t know how to respond.”

2) Third limited omniscient

          “Honey, what’s wrong?” Ian asks his girlfriend Julie as he reaches for her hand across the table at their booth in the diner.

          Julie pulls her hand away quickly; she is uncomfortable by the physical contact since it will make breaking up with Ian so much harder. Julie thought about all of the times she had rehearsed this exact moment over the last two days, but breaking up with Ian in person was probing to be much harder. But then again, she thought, why should I care how Ian will feel about breaking up since he’s only leading me on? She couldn’t figure out why it took her even this long to break it off with him.

          “Well,” Julie starts “it’s  nothing…” she trails off, losing her nerve.

          “Honey, it’s clearly something. Come on, you know that you can talk to me.” Ian replies.

          Julie tries to look into Ian’s eyes as she tries to start the uncomfortable conversation. His dark blue eyes gaze deeply into her pale brown ones, causing her to lose her nerve yet again.

          “Well, why don’t I start?” Ian suggests. “I invited you here because I wanted to tell you something important, and I chose this place because I knew it is your favorite, so… well here it goes” Ian pauses.

          Julie fidgets underneath the booth table, unable to anticipate what Ian is trying to say.

          Ian took a large breath as the words rush out of his mouth, “These last few months have been amazing, and I never thought I would have such strong feelings for you… I guess what I have to say is that I love you, Julie.”

          Julie stares back at Ian, unable to figure out what to say. He completely shocked her and took her by surprise. “I guess that wasn’t going where I thought it was… I don’t know how to respond.”

3) Third objective

          “Honey, what’s wrong?” Ian asks his girlfriend Julie as he reaches his hand across the booth at their table at the diner.

          Julie immediately pulls her hand away and crosses her arms, avoiding the physical contact that Ian offered her. Julie openly frowns and appears to be very conflicted. “Well,” she starts. “It’s nothing” she trails off, losing the nerve to say what she was about to say.

          “Honey, it’s clearly something. Come on, you know you can talk to me.”

          Julie looks up to make eye contact with Ian but she quickly loses her nerve and looks back down at the table.

“Well, why don’t I start?” Ian suggests. “I invited you here because I wanted to tell you something important, and I chose this place because I knew it is your favorite, so… well here it goes” Ian pauses.

          Julie fidgets underneath the booth table, unable to anticipate what Ian is trying to say.

          Ian took a large breath as the words rush out of his mouth, “These last few months have been amazing, and I never thought I would have such strong feelings for you… I guess what I have to say is that I love you, Julie.”

          Julie stares back at Ian, unable to figure out what to say. He completely shocked her and took her by surprise. “I guess that wasn’t going where I thought it was… I don’t know how to respond.”

4) Third omniscient

          “Honey, what’s wrong?” Ian asks his girlfriend Julie as he reaches for her hand across the table at their booth in the diner. Ian is concerned because Julie has hardly made eye contact all lunch, and he thinks there is something wrong with her.

          Julie pulls her hand away quickly; she is uncomfortable by the physical contact since it will make breaking up with Ian so much harder. Julie thought about all of the times she had rehearsed this exact moment over the last two days, but breaking up with Ian in person was probing to be much harder. But then again, she thought, why should I care how Ian will feel about breaking up since he’s only leading me on? She couldn’t figure out why it took her even this long to break it off with him.

          “Well,” Julie starts “it’s  nothing…” she trails off, losing her nerve, making Ian even more worried.

          “Honey, it’s clearly something. Come on, you know that you can talk to me.” Ian replies, thinking of all the times he has supported Julie.

          Julie tries to look into Ian’s eyes as she tries to start the uncomfortable conversation. His dark blue eyes gaze deeply into her pale brown ones trying to encourage her, but instead causes her to lose her nerve yet again.

          “Well, why don’t I start?” Ian suggests. “I invited you here because I wanted to tell you something important, and I chose this place because I knew it is your favorite, so… well here it goes” Ian pauses, getting nervous.

          Julie fidgets underneath the booth table, unable to anticipate what Ian is trying to say.

          Ian took a large breath as the words rush out of his mouth, “These last few months have been amazing, and I never thought I would have such strong feelings for you… I guess what I have to say is that I love you, Julie.”

          Julie stares back at Ian, unable to figure out what to say. He completely shocked her and took her by surprise. “I guess that wasn’t going where I thought it was… I don’t know how to respond.”

Personally I like the third person omniscient view because it was easiest to write, but the third person objective is more effective because it forces the writer to show instead of tell the reader what is going on.